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February 2016

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Overheard at WisCon

11.) "I need to pee--"
       "Not here."

12.) R'lyehan tourist phrasebook:

Help. I am being devoured by your octopus.

My species does not breathe water.

No thank you. I do not wish a fungus.

I'm sorry, no. I have claustrophobia.

You seem to have a frog in your throat.
You seem to have a frog in your soup.
You seem to have a frog in your pants.

Would you like a lemon drop?

Comments

I was at a gathering of authors after a signing at Pandemonium, and at one point, people were discussing a phrasebook entirely made of phrases that you hoped you'd never need to use in other languages. People threw out a whole bunch of them, and there was laughter, and it sort of drifted off, and suddenly, from the other end of the table, Joe Haldeman quietly said, "That was not the leg you were supposed to amputate."
A friend of mine was getting knee surgery in Hong Kong and was just going under when suddenly he realized the doctors were talking (in Mandarin) about performing the surgery on the wrong knee.

Fortunately, he managed to convey this to them before he passed out...