writing rengeek magpie mind

September 2014

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criminal minds fate

This is just to say:

To everybody who has opined recently that sexual harassment policies at conventions mean an end to flirtation, dating, and romance at cons--

I'm involved in a relationship with somebody I met, befriended, and grew to love largely at conventions. He never once felt the need to grope me, make an inappropriate comment on my body or dress, or ask if anything I was wearing was meant as a coded sexual message before the moment when we figured out that we were each interested in one another in a romantic sense.

Neither flirting nor building emotional connection is harassment, folks--and harassment is not flirting.

It's not actually all that complicated.

Comments

My definition of "harassment" would include the word "predatory" near the word "intent." Harassment is about gaining, or demonstrating power over someone. Flirting is about indicating that you would like to get to know someone better. Big difference.
This.
Popping over from lurkdom to say I sort of agree- the predatory part, for sure- but at the same time, intention or not, there's definitely creeper behavior.It may be unintentional, but it's still creepy, and is still NOT okay- especially when said creeper repeatedly 'forgets' that he's been told not to do X thing, or assumes that "Don't do that, it is creepy adn inappropriate" only applies to the one person who has told him that instead of being a general rule.