I've read worse than the first, but I used to read slushporn.
"Oh noe, I Will not goe backe to the Inn-roome with you! For the last time I did thatt, I coulde nott Walke for a Weeke."
(There is a certain producer of gay porn whose dialog almost always goes something like: "Oh, no, [insert name], I'm not going [to the theme location] with you! The last time I did that, I couldn't walk for a week." It's something of a local joke.)