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bear by san

March 2017



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writing gorey vast reluctance

welcome to your life.

Gah. My muscle aches have muscle aches. I meant to write tonight, but instead what I am doing is writing myself Earbrassian editing notes:

Make this nonsense all make sense. Have this scene in the kitchen instead?

...and so on.

Isn't this book finished yet?

What the hell is the next scene about, anyway?


I'd be happy to answer the second question if you send me all your work in progress to date. :-)
Heh. NOBODY sees this.
Naproxen and wine for you.

Oh, I love those notes.

"Write this part"
"Make this section not SUCK LIKE A HOOVER"
"Edit this. PS Edit this when AWAKE"
"Re crossing river - Does this town even HAVE a river? Check map"
"Does this have any relevance to the plot or is this character wankery again?"
"WTF was the point here?"
"GO back and CHANGE ALL THIS CRAP so it works with chapter 3 rev. NOT RELATED ARGH!"
"Just because YOU laughed doesn't mean it's funny enough to stay in the book"
"Dear characters: pls stop TALKING"
"Glue this to the scene in Ch.5 and take rest out back and shoot it"
"What was I thinking? Was I thinking? Is this character wankery again?"
"Too long - they've been in the kitchen for a week now, srsly"

and the ever-popular "And then a miracle occurs and Ch.14 arrives gift-wrapped on the doorstep from the Plot Fairies"
HOW off topic is this?

CM: Season 1, Ep. 4.

I can't breathe.

Apparently, this is the post in which we talk about CM.

Wait until you get to 1x6.

Just the combination of the triggery things that are icky and lazy and waxy and then it's all mixed up with the familiarity of Reed and Garcia's psyches and the empathy of "She's surrounded by men."

gaaaaaahhhh. (I'm all non-verbal).
Erm, I'm lacking spelling and things right now. pls to be forgiving.

It was 2x15 that triggered me into insomnia until 5 am the next morning.

They get stuff right, these guys. 0.0

Ex cops apparently make good TV producers.
They do. They really do. But what's funny is there wasn't really anything there for them to get right EXCEPT for psyche and need and floundering. I mean, for me in particular. It wasn't a particularly, erm, APT episode factually for me or anything. But there were just all of these open, vulnerable moments....

They get trauma. And they respect it.
The next scene is about the ache and the stunned numbness and the catch of breath that comes about and then it's there, slowly building and then immediate, right now, somewhere between remembering the possibility of "first love" and then, once you've started doing that, knowing and remembering and feeling with certainty that all that possibility leads to is tied up, shoved to your knees, and slapped in the face so hard you fall over and later the pinnacle of your cheek bone will swell up to be That Big.

Or maybe instead there are balloons, and a circus, and some tigers.

I cooked tonight, you know. Before I watched that, I cooked things, and they were tasty. More on that when my sanity returns.

Best show on TV.
Heh... kitchens make EVERYTHING make sense.

I recently left myself a "wtf are you trying to say here?" note on a story. Good question. I wish I knew........ ;)

Apparently all it needs is a kitchen, though.
Rule of parties: the best conversation is always in the kitchen.
Except for the ones on the back porch, outside the kitchen, with the smokers.

WTF Notes

Some of the tools I use to write software have this nifty note feature. You put a comment somewhere in your program that starts with some standard text like TODO: or WTF: and the tool keeps an index of all the places it finds that text, allowing you to click on a link and go to any one of them at a later date, presumably to fix the problem. So I have all these notes that say things like "TODO: make this code work right" or "WTF: what was I thinking?". All the better to stare at the screen in confusion.

Re: WTF Notes

Yeah, good old 'TODO: Code goes here'... :-)