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bear by san

December 2021



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fare you well, i love you more than words can tell

Apparently, we have entered the phase of post-novel ennui where we do nothing but play Chuzzle and feel useless. I'm also trying to read Brasyl, but having a heck of a time focusing on anything that feels too much like work. This is, of course, a normal part of my cognitive process, and how the recovery thing works. The left brain, lazy slacker that it is, demands time to think about stuff. And since I am currently trying to rearrange my life to give it that sabbatical, I should probably take advantage of it and grab the break while I can.

It's hard for me to remember that the to-do list is never going to get any shorter, you see, and no matter how fast I run I am never going to be finished with it. (Well, I hope not, anyway, because if I am, I need to find a new career.)

So, like Travis McGee, I have to learn to take my retirement in pieces.

One thing about this while writing gig that's challenging is that it's all such intense work. It's self-exhaustive, and I also tend to find people kind of self-exhaustive (I'm used to being alone a lot of the time, and being around people tires me out) and there have been a lot of people this summer. Which is NOT a bad thing, by any means. But it does mean that I feel like I've boiled kind of low, and I probably need to top off again. No matter how good your work ethic, creative work isn't exactly always as amenable to the same kinds of push-through as some of the jobs I've had answering phones, digging ditvches, and so forth.

Which does not excuse one from applying the seat of the pants to the seat of the chair, mind you, and getting the damned work done.

However, I need to acknowledge to myself that some of this other stuff--conventions, nonfiction, blogging, page proofs, copy-edited manuscripts, research, the works--that's work, too. And it's work that needs to be done, and which can't always happen in the cracks around writing frantically for every waking moment of the day.

A little generosity to yourself, Bear. It doesn't hurt.

So I'm going to give myself a little time. I have got some revisions to get through after Readercon, on "The Red in the Sky is Our Blood," but other than that, we'll take it easy for a little while. I will probably start trying to do four pages or four hours a day again after Readercon, but we'll try for a sustainable pace raher than a huge crush.

In honor of that, my current to-do list.


Revise "The Red in the Sky is Our Blood"
Write chapbook short for Bill.
Revise Bone and Jewel Creatures
Finish Chill
Revise One-Eyed Jack and the Suicide King
Write S2 Shadow Unit episodes (looks like 2.5 right now, unless stuff changes.)
Write "Mongoose" with truepenny (started)
Write "Smile" (started)
Write "Snow Dragons"


Rewrite The Sea thy Mistress
Write Patience & Fortitude
Shadow Unit S3
Write Grail.


I could give it a shot, sure.

Re: Thank you so much for agreeing to be my next victim!

Email's fine. Mine's on my web page.

How complicated can it be? :-)
I really appreciate that you're willing to share this aspect of your writing - the parts that suck, the parts that are harder than anyone would expect looking in from the outside, the parts that make it the difficult career path that it is.

As someone who is working up to sending out her first stories, it's good to hear about the good parts, but it's good to hear that the bad parts don't just dog me and that they don't magically go away even when you have enough writing work to quit your day job.

Thanks for being willing to share your life like this.

Also, see you at readercon.

Thank you for all these peeks in to the life of a professional writer. It's quite fascinating (not to mention thought provoking to those trying to squeeze some creative life into a 9 to 5 (or 9 to 7) exsistence. :)
I'm used to being alone a lot of the time, and being around people tires me out

And I haven't been helping, have I? )-: As much as it'd be great to see you, I do seem to come with my own little crowd of people these days.
*g* Also, I have the power to make babies cry by breathing on them.
Now you two are writing male/male MONGOOSE BONDING books? Have you no shame? Think of the cobras!
It's hard for me to remember that the to-do list is never going to get any shorter, you see, and no matter how fast I run I am never going to be finished with it.

Ye gods, you are a productive creature. If you find you're constitutionally incapable of dialing back (as I suspect could be the case), you might consider starting a side project that's creative but not language-based (ceramics, drawing, that sort of thing). I'm no good at relaxing, but if I work on a project that uses different skills than my main project, it at least gives me some cognitive balance.
So will you be bringing your guitar to Readercon and performing for us? ;-)
That would spark a great deal of regret on your part, I suspect. *g*