it's a great life, if you don't weaken (matociquala) wrote,
it's a great life, if you don't weaken

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...i got a Nellie Fox baseball card from 1963 and a head in a box.

Still hard to resist that line.

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Wonder if I'll manage to get up and go running in the morning, since I just finished making bread, I'm playing Scrabble with stillsostrange and leahbobet, and I'm not sleepy at all.

And I met a milestone with Sanction Chill today, which is this: I just finished revising all the stuff I had written, and I am now on page 270 with only new prose to write. (There are 17 pages of notes ahead of me, never fear.) I wrote 834 words today, and revised a ton of stuff, and I'm quite happy. I still don't quite know how the transition to the end of the book works, or exactly how the climax falls out, but I do know that I have approximately 125 pages and 5 1/2 chapters to accomplish this in.

Which is a nice, manageable chunk of writing, and sort of comforts me. The book isn't so much the monster under the bed anymore: I'm getting the bastard broken to harness. That's a good feeling, even if I am still at this point waiting for my subconscious to tell me how the story goes. (You have to wait it out, sometimes, while it's back there gronking away at stuff slowly and painstakingly. Very Tiresome.)

In any case, I can bring you the book's epigraph list. Which lies

When a great ship is in harbor and moored, it is safe, there can be no doubt. But... that is not what great ships are built for.
--Clarissa Pinkola Estés, Ph.D., Letter To A Young Activist During Troubled Times

The fool hath said in his heart, there is no such thing as justice, and sometimes also with his tongue.
--Thomas Hobbes, Leviathan

I will make your offspring as unto the dust of the Cosmos, so that if anyone could count the dust, then your offspring could be counted.
--Genesis 13:16, New Evolutionist Bible

His heart is as hard as a world, as hard as a the grinding millstone. When he rises up, the mighty are afraid: they purify themselves in fear of his violence.
--Job 41, 24-25, New Evolutionist Bible

Who can open the doors of his face? His teeth are terrible round about. His scales are his pride, shut up together as with a close seal. One is so near to another, that no air can come between them.
--Job 41, v. 14-16, King James Bible

They hatch cockatrice's eggs, and weave the spider's web: he that eateth of their eggs dieth, and that which is crushed breaketh out into a viper.
--Isaiah 59:5, King James Bible

The darkest part of the kingdom of Satan is that which is without the Church of God.
--Thomas Hobbes, Leviathan

As for the instance of gaining the secure and perpetual felicity of heaven by any way, it is frivolous; there being but one way imaginable, and that is not breaking, but keeping of covenant.
--Thomas Hobbes, Leviathan

...the kingdom of darkness... is nothing else but a confederacy of deceivers that, to obtain dominion over men in this present world, endeavour, by dark and erroneous doctrines, to extinguish in them the light...
--Thomas Hobbes, Leviathan

But now, from between the black & white spiders, a cloud and fire burst and rolled thro' the deep black'ning all beneath, so that the nether deep grew black as a sea, & rolled with a terrible noise; beneath us was nothing now to be seen but a black tempest, till looking east between the clouds & the waves, we saw a cataract of blood mixed with fire, and not many stones' throw from us appear'd and sunk again the scaly fold of a monstrous serpent...
--William Blake, The Marriage of Heaven and Hell

Shall the companions make a banquet of him? Shall they part him among the merchants? Canst thou fill his skin with barbed irons? Or his head with fish spears?
--Job 41, 6-7, King James Version

The greatest and main abuse of Scripture, and to which almost all the rest are either consequent or subservient, is the wresting of it to prove that the kingdom of God, mentioned so often in the Scripture, is the present Church, or multitude of Christian men now living, or that, being dead, are to rise again at the last day.
--Thomas Hobbes, Leviathan

Dostoevsky once wrote: "If God did not exist, everything would be permitted"; and that, for existentialism, is the starting point.... Nor...if God does not exist, are we provided with any values or commands that could legitimize our behavior.... We are left alone, without excuse. That is what I mean when I say that man is condemned to be free.
--Jean-Paul Sartre, Existentialism Is a Humanism (1946)

'But', I asked, 'how will man be after that? Without God and the future life? It means everything is permitted now, one can do anything?'
'Didn't you know?' he said and he laughed. 'Everything is permitted to the intelligent man.'
--Fyodor Dostoevsky, The Brothers Karamazov

All things are lawful unto me, but all things are not expedient: all things are lawful for me, but I will not be brought under the power of any.
--1 Corinthians 6:12, King James Bible

Who hath prevented me, that I should repay him? whatsoever is under the whole heaven is mine.
--Job 41:11 King James Bible

No matter where; of comfort no man speak:
Let's talk of graves, of worms, and epitaphs;
Make dust our paper and with rainy eyes
Write sorrow on the bosom of the earth
--William Shakespeare, Richard II, Act III scene ii

Canst thou draw out leviathan with an hook? or his tongue with a cord which thou lettest down? Canst thou put an hook into his nose? or bore his jaw through with a thorn? Will he make many supplications unto thee? will he speak soft words unto thee? Will he make a covenant with thee? wilt thou take him for a servant for ever?
--Job 41, 1-4, King James Bible

Lay thine hand upon him, remember the battle, do no more.
--Job 41:8, King James Bible

Great. Now I just have to write it.

I suspect there will be a couple of days of letting things stew in there first, however, much as it annoys me not to just be able to reach into my pocket and pull out the end of the book.

Ah well. If you want me, I'll be thinking.
Tags: jacob's ladder
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