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bear by san

March 2017



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bear by san


The short review: It was a better movie than Queen of the Damned.

Since Queen of the Damned was the worst movie ever made, that's not saying much. I actually cannot remember the last time I sat in a movie theatre actually resenting the film I was watching for existing.

This is not a movie worth doing a long review of, except to note that the most common line of dialogue in the movie was "Leave us!" A wise audience would take that as a breaking-the-fourth-wall suggestion, and suit action to words.


Excuse me?

Movies I resent existing? The Net. That movie never ended, it just dragged on and on, so life-suckingly, mind-numbingly draining the not even Dennis Miller's bad acting could cause enough amusement to lighten the spirits of the poor fools trapped in the theatre by the sheer force of it's suckiness. Brian and I are still trapped in that theatre.

Re: Excuse me?

"Two weeks into this movie, I knew I wasn't going to like it--"
Well, I'm also notoriously short-tempered with bad acting, pacing flaws, and Chekov's gun violations (especially the Chekov's gun violations.) I think I can see how somebody *would* like it, from an actiony standpoint.

On the other hand, there are movies I love that apparently nobody else on earth can stand, so perhaps I just have lousy taste. *g*
Ooo. Cutthroat Island.


That movie *almost* cured my crush on Geena Davis. But I suppose it does get the pirate movie nod.
I'll agree it was bad, and the group I saw it with even commented on the same repetitious line. Add in the fact that the writes seemed to have forgotten to put in an actual plot. And the gore-for-the-sake-of-gore ending to the big, final fight was pretty annoying as well.

However, all that said, I'd see it again (preferably with the sound off so it doesn't distract from the whole point of the movie). Mmmm, vinyl catsuit with corset. :)
Hee. If only the boys in the movie were cuter.

The guy playing Lucien was actually a decent actor, though, when they got him away from the scene-chewers.
Given that it was the second feature at the drive-in and the first feature was the incredibly awful Antonio Banderas something in Mexico thing, it didn't seem that bad.

However, (SPOILERS),

It did lead to one of the few fights my boyfriend and I have had, when after the final scene I turned to him and said "that doesn't make any sense. They said that werewolf blood would kill vampires, and yet they show Marcusbeing animated by the blood from the dead werewolf." He hadn't noticed the blood, and it sort of went downhill from there.

Yes, in general, there are Mad Libs with more internal logical consistency *g*
I saw it too, but enjoyed the part where I got to point out the bad acting, ripped-off-from-the-Matrix elements, and forgetability of the plot. My short review: This will be in the VCR discount bins at $2.99 this time next year.