Soon as my hands stop trembling.
Interestingly, I think Liz's suggestions will bring the story closer to my vision, if I can pull them off. And I think the story has some currency in this day and age. I'm having the frustrating sensation of knowing what's wrong with the story, and not knowing how to get there from here. Pen talked me into a focus chat on it, and Mel kindly let me swap her for her day, since I'm under time pressure. ::Begs gods for inspiration::
And my MP3 player is being creepily prescient again.
It's always the old to lead us to the war.
It's always the young to fall:
Look at all we've won with the saber and the gun
And tell me was it worth it all?
Call it peace or call it treason,
Call it love or call it reason,
But I ain't marching amymore.
Where have all the soldiers gone?
Gone to graveyards, every one.
And that's what it is. The Alice's Restaurant Anti-Massacree Movement, and all you gotta do to join is sing it the next time it comes around on the gitar.