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bear by san

March 2017



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The Mythbusters attempt to polish, well... a turd.

This amuses me because "turd-polishing" is a common phrase bandied around SFF workshops, meaning the act of fiddling with the sentences and commas in an essentially broken narrative.

Even if you succeed, well. What you have is a high-gloss turd.


From what I remember of the ep... it was a SMELLY high-gloss turd.

I've also heard "you can't wash garbage" a bit for similar meanings.

A college roommate says the most important thing he learned in college was how to write badly. He could already write well -- if he could build the complete paper in his head, when he wrote it out it was good. He learned how to write rough approximations of larger and more complex papers, and then improve them incrementally until they were good. He went on to become a lawyer, so this has been fairly important for him.
Oh man...

Also, what would the purpose of those shiny dirtballs be?
Shiny balls of dirt...Shiny balls of anything are not art.

I get crazy whacked out art. S see how squiggly lines drawn on a canvas could be art. But shiny balls just don't fit that definition.
They look like art to me. http://www.dorodango.com/about.html

Then again, I used to spend many a pleasant afternoon trying to make the perfect sandball when I was a kid. Was all about the process.
Oh wow. Those actually look very good. I especially like the yellow textured one.

*shuts up*
I guess i just don't see shiny balls of anything as particularly pretty. And think those would hurt.

It would however be interesting if the shining technique could be used on other shapes. I mean you could build a pretty big temple or something with mud bricks, wood beams and you could use (shiny!) dirt to decorate it.
I guess i just don't see shiny balls of anything as particularly pretty.

Well, since when is art necessarily "pretty"?
I was using the word from the bove post. It's not, it's supposed to make you feel something. And for me shiny balls of stuff don't fit. Even if it's to remind me that simple things are important.
Nifty, but they're shiny because they're painted, not because of being shined (as far as i can tell).
Speaking of jewelry...My aunt once gave me a shellacked moose poop on a necklace after her trip to Alaska!
But it's glossy and shiny, and that makes it ever so special!
I remember watching that episode and thinking, "Yes, but can they wax or vacuum a cat?"
A turd is poop in its original shape, so they haven't exactly polished turds.
Or, in the world of my friends who used to run a recording studio, turd-polishing meant playing around with reverb, pitch-bend and all the other processing toys in the studio until the the lead guitarist's girlfriend on backing vocals sounded approximately like a real singer and less like a strangled guinea pig.
Of course, there are some things that just can't be rescued. One band had a couple of friends playing bodhran. It was quite sad really - on live gigs, they went through the sound-check, then as soon as the gig started, their sliders were pulled down to zero. They spent time in the studio and were later replaced with a drum-loop.
Will someone shut tha bloody bodhran player up?
My little brother works in a plating plant, and along with the big industrial jobs, sometimes they get little one-off things, like baby shoes. My aunt's Christmas gift one year from him was having all of the heat register covers in her old english manor home replated with silver, which was very cool, and made her very happy.

He tells me that yes, they have plated turds before, which makes them much easier to polish. So, if anybody wants a gold-plated turd, all you need is a lot of money, and... ...uh, a turd.
Some people's children.
The really hilarious thing about that episode was that they succeeded in giving the turds high glosses. The other really funny thing -- and you must take their word for this because TV isn't olfactory -- is that they still smelled pretty much as one would expect after the process.
But in 100 million years, think of the coprolites.
I can't help but wonder what such a fossil will say about our civilization...