August 1st, 2007

writing gorey earbrass unspeakable horro

She's away and westward bound.

What do we mean when we say category fiction?


Watch this.

Now, watch this.

Those are superficially similar songs. By which I mean, if you wrote a synopsis of the plot of each one, it would be virtually identical.

But the John Denver song is a pretty, fatuous lie, and the Gordon Lightfoot song is the truth, even when it hurts to tell.

And that, right there?

Is the difference between subscribing to the genre conventions without questioning them, and attempting to see and describe the real object. One is facile, simple, comforting, and full of convenient lies. The other one is the result of a long, hard, cold look at all the ways you've fucked this thing up, right here.

It's worth the attempt.
rengeek kit & tilda lucifer/gabriel

Cat vs. Monkey: Weapons of Mass Destruction

Monkey: Cat, are you dead?
Cat: I don't feel good, monkey.
Monkey: Oh, poor kitty. Come here and I will scritch you. Does your tummy hurt?
Cat: I think I might be dying.
Monkey: I think you just need to relax. No wet food today, kiddo.
Cat: *moans heartrendingly*
Monkey: *scritches*
Monkey: Poor kitty.
Cat: *runs to litterbox*
Monkey. Poor kitty.
Cat: *produces truly toxic aromas*
Monkey: OMG. I think I might be dead. Cat, where did you put the gas mask? Is it in the kitchen?--
Cat: *emerges from bathroom, innocent utterly of all wrongdoing*
Monkey: Cat?
Cat: *chalant*
Monkey: Wasn't there a third of a stick of butter in the butter dish when I went to bed last night?
Cat: Butter? What is this substance of which you speak? I am certain I have never heard of such.
Monkey: Oh, my God. What happened in this litterbox?
Cat: Nevermind. I feel much better now. What's for breakfast?
criminal minds reid mathematics

here's a health to all good sailors. may they never ever die.

Well, I have finished chapter ten of the Algebra book. Next up, chapter 11, proportions. I hope the sense of getting the hang of this I've been having is not self-deception, because I'm sort of enjoying it.

Via lexiphanic, a meme where you set your playlist on randomize, list a lyric from the first 25 songs that come up (without cheating) and invite people to guess the song. GOOGLING IS CHEATING.

Made for me, right? Right.

Winamp says it has 13,871 sound files to work with. I will edit out the ones that are instrumental or in languages I do not speak well enough to transcribe.

Here goes.

1.) You can stake that claim. Good work is the key to good fortune. (Rush - Roll the Bones skidspoppe)
2.) Boiled in Lead - Cuz Mapfumo
2.) She had not pulled a rose, a rose, a rose but barely one-- (Steeleye Span -Tam Lin sovay)
3.) Ian Anderson - The Stormont Shuffle
3.) Movie sound file clip: "Spandex! It's a privilege, not a right!" Yes, I am about to turn 36, how kind of you to notice.

3.) Every night my dream's the same. Same old city but a different game. (The Arcade Fire - Keep The Car Running nebula99)
4.) You've been saying it's hard to sleep. You've been thinking of me. For some reason you're afraid to feel.
5.) I've seen a lot of sunshine. Slept out in the rain. Spent a night or two all on my own. (Oh man, hoist on my own petard.) (John Denver - Poems, Prayers, and Promises mrissa, though she tried not to claim it.)
6.) I hear your voice in every corridor. I see your face in every picture frame. I feel your eyes in every starry sky. Lover, am I coming home again? (Oh, MUCH better.) (Janis Ian - Light A Light warriorofworry; desperance)
7.) And you know there was twelve coal-black horses on Britannia Street. Twelve coal-black hustlers decked in leather, don't you know it?
8.) Got no time to pack my bags. My foot's outside the door. (Led Zeppelin - The Ocean rezendi)
9.) Tangerine Dream - Purple of All Curtains
9.) When all my hopes and dreams have been betrayed I stand before you. My hands are empty. (Tracy Chapman - I Am Yours sargent)
10.) Jethro Tull - Elegy
10.) One more day all on my own. One more day with him not caring. (Les Miserables (Company) One Day More sovay)
11.) Haul on the bowline, the captain is a-growling! (Bob Neuwirth - Haul on the Bowline sovay)
12.) She went to church on Sunday and sang the anthem sweet. The parson was a misery, so scraggy and so thin. Look here, you motherfuckers, if you lead a life of sin-- (Nick Cave - Fire Down Belowsovay)
13.) Big time rollers. Part time models. So much to plunder that I think I'll sleep instead. (Rufus Wainwright - California caoilfhionn)
14.) Tchaikovsky - Swan Lake, Op. 20, Waltz
14.) Mystery Science Theatre - Gypsy Moons

14.) It's you that I adore. You'll always be my whore. (Candymachine 88 with Tina Root - Ava Adore -- half credit to erinya, half credit to hernewshoes)
15.) He came from Heaven, two stakes in his hand. To stalk the vampires and free the land. (theme from Jesus Christ Vampire Hunter: "Everybody Gets Laid Tonight" blackaire)
16.) Then Marcus heard on the radio that a movie star was dying. He turned the tuner way down low so Hortense could go on sleeping. (Phil Ochs - Jim Dean of Indiana hernewshoes)
17.) Kraftwek - Pocket Calculator
17.) Beethoven - Moonlight Sonata

17.) I am he as you are he as you are me and we are all together. (this is a live cover version. with a lot of brass.) (Oingo Boingo - I Am The Walrus-- half credit to erinya, half credit to "rosefox)
18.) I see the clouds move across the sky. I see the wind that moves the clouds away. It moves the clouds over by the building. I pick a building that I want to live in. (Talking Heads -- Don't Worry About The Government Half credit to stotangirl; half to jeffsoesbe)
19.) It's happening now. Not tomorrow. It's happening now. The crazed in the hot-zone. The mental and diva's hands. The fisting of life. (David Bowie - Outside stillsostrange)
20.) Does your memory stray to a bright summer's day when I kissed you and called you sweetheart? (this particular version is a duet performed by both performers who made this song famous.) (Elvis Presley & Roy Orbison - Are You Lonesome Tonight, 2/3rds credit to shana, 1/3rd credit to hernewshoes, who got it with a little coaching)
21.) The naked dutch painter in the kitchen does not want to fuck you. She's got seventeen boyfriends and an eight o'clock class to get to. (Stew - The Naked Dutch Painter gwynnega)
22.) Some folks love to feel pain. Some folks wake up every morning. Some folks live for no reason. Some folks die without a warning. (Alice Cooper - Some Folks jennifer_dunne)
23.) And the change in your pocket is beginning to crumble and you reap just about what you sow. (Fairport Convention - Reno Nevada carbonel)
24.) We wake alone in the blackness. We sleep wherever we fall. (Shriekback - This Big Hush - zanzjan)
25.)  Cross Nevada at a 110. Highway 50 and there's nobody there. Sign says, "NEXT SIGN 30 MILES." (The Dead Kennedys, Buzzbomb From Pasadena hernewshoes) know, my music collection really does read like a coded list of people I used to be in love with. Every relationship leaves behind a detritus of new music....

problem cat

(no subject)

Just came home to the news from the Twin Cities. I think everybody I know there has checked in. I'm tremendously grateful you're all safe, and hoping for the best for the injured.

1crowdedhour suggests that this might not be a bad time to get your blood donor card punched, and I concur.

ETA: Mppls Fandom check-in thread:
spies mfu illya bitch please _ truepenny

just last night i was reminded of just how bad it had gotten and just how sick i had become

Toby should not have to make this post.

Prove his heritage? Good lord.

You know, I talk about being Swedish and Ukrainian here all the time, and nobody's yet emailed me to suggest I "prove" my heritage.

I'm just going to go splutter helplessly in the corner now.

Queers, freaks, and people of color:


Or got their queer freaky people of color germs on your chair.
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