April 1st, 2014

problem cat

the moste piteous reveng of cat vs. monkey




This is Microsoft Cat. He is my stepcat. He belongs to my boyfriend.

Here is how my morning went:


6:00 am: 

MICROSOFT CAT: MONKEY YOU DIURNAL RIGHT?
MONKEY: What the fuck, cat?
MICROSOFT CAT: YOU DIURNAL! YOU GETS UP AND PLAY DURING DAYTIME! IS DAYTIME! GETS UP AND PLAY!
Monkey: The sky might be a little bit grey.
MICROSOFT CAT: IS BRIGHT! GETS UP!
MONKEY: Cat, I will finish you.
MICROSOFT CAT: *digs under covers, wet noses in ears, general tromping and tickling*


6:30 am:

FITBIT ALARM: *buzzes*
MICROSOFT CAT: It looks like you're trying to get out of bed! I HEPS!
MICROSOFT CAT: *settles down cozily and purrs, emitting sleepions.*
MONKEY: Motherfucker.