contemplativeComplaint Department: *mysteriously absent*
Monkey: Why is there a hairball in my bed?
Complaint Department: *curiously elsewhere*
Monkey: Why is there a hairball in my bed, between the sheets?
Complaint Department: *nowhere to be found*
Monkey: Cat, if you're unwell, perhaps we need to go to the vet. Seriously. This hairball!
Complaint Department: It's spring. I'm shedding.
Monkey: In my bed!
Complaint Department: I didn't feel good. It was a very large hairball.
Monkey: Between the SHEETS!
Complaint Department: The kitten tucked me in. Besides, it was time you changed the sheets anyway.
Monkey: I just changed them last week.
Complaint Department: You're not the only one who sleeps in this bed, you know.
Monkey: Trust me. I know.
Complaint Department: ...
Monkey: I don't love you anymore.
Complaint Department: You were never worthy of me anyway.
hairball roulette