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bear by san

March 2017



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can't sleep books will eat me

it makes a grown man cry.

Pick up the nearest book to you.
Turn to page 45.
The first sentence describes your sex life in 2012.

"He was conscious, but too weak for want of air to curl a finger or blink an eye."

--Shattered Pillars, Elizabeth Bear.

Hey, I'm editing.

Closest book NOT by me is The Russia House (John Le Carre), which offers:

"'Niki, first we have to thank you, pal,' Johnny said, in lazy East Coast American."

(via snurri)


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Hip drive is the basis for squatting power, and even though it is anatomically complex, hip drive can be learned easily and quickly.

-- Starting Strength, Mark Rippetoe
Ars Amatoria I (Ovid, with notes by Elizabeth Block):

"Apollo was so horrified by the sight that in mid-course he turned his sun-chariot back toward dawn."

...this does not bode well.
(Though on reflection, this is not nearly so bad as if I had gotten the previous sentence, which was all about the profane sexual act that so horrified Apollo.)

"You promised, my love, you promised to destroy me."

- Ventriloquism, Catherynne M. Valente.
Mine also doesn't bode well.</p>

From Pompeii by Robert Harris.

"Behind them--obsequious, malevolent, inescapable--came Corax."

None of the other books in the pile fair any better.

"Of the forthcoming pictures only one was in Class 1. The Sound of Music, called in Spanish Smiles and Tears.

And even worse....

"Everyone hates you."

Clearly I need different reading material.

Huh. I figured being at work with the nearest book being Oracle 8: the Complete Reference would go poorly. However, I ended up with "SQL: From Beginner to Expert", which doesn't sound like a bad progression for a sex life.
I didn't have any books near me so I just went with the two books I am currently reading.

"Every little bit helps." - Up Against It by M.J. Locke (Er-)

"The question 'Who am I?' is one of our basic existential queries." - Somebodies and Nobodies: Overcoming the Abuse of Rank by Robert W. Fuller (So there may be some memory loss involved...)
"The capability to pass arguments to error messages greatly increases the flexibility of the error system."

-Teach yourself Transact SQL in 21 days

Er. I think this either means 'communicate communicate communicate' or I'm in real trouble.
I can't decide wether mine is the most irrelavant or the most relevant sentence:

"Peeta's the baker's son."
-The Hunger Games, Suzanne Collins

Either way I'd be - very surprised.

(On page 44 two werewolves are arguing about who she belongs to. She states that it would have been flattering but) p45 "... at least one of them was talking about dinner and I wasn't certain about the other."

The first complete sentence is, "While Adam had Matt distracted, I reached behind me and grabbed my big crowbar from the shelf directly behind us." (She hits him with it.)

Edited at 2012-01-11 07:38 pm (UTC)
Chicken Maryland - deep fried battered or crumbled chicken pieces with corn fritters and bacon.

Don't know if this is good or bad. At least I won't go hungry.
"Mario Rioz was glad he was awake so that he could watch again"

Hmmm, I am not sure if that bodes or not.

(Extract from Asimov's 'The Martian Way', in a collection of bits of his work called "Opus" - in this case, talking about space-walking.)

I REALLY don't like this one:
"He knew the penalties for aggravated rape, exploitation of a person in a subordinate position, abuse, and aggravated abuse; he reckoned he would get at least six years in prison." -- THE GIRL WHO PLAYED WITH FIRE, Steig Larsson
I was alarmed by mine but yours is much worse.
I grabbed the nearest book as instructed. The first complete sentence on p. 45 of Charlie Stross's Palimpsest is "Pierce was to remain on convalescent leave for an entire year-subjective'. Gee, thanks Bear.
Mine was so much better? ;-)
"Forgotten, I'd wager," said Dearly. - Fragile Things, Neil Gaiman ... October Was in the Chair

Well I hope that doesn't come true.
"The two histograms--petal number and plant height--are independent data collections."

Perhaps we'll meet, each carrying a small soft paintbrush.
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