it's a great life, if you don't weaken (matociquala) wrote,
it's a great life, if you don't weaken
matociquala

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hortas got legs

So today, we went to the revamped Star Trek, The Experience, a bourgeois excrescence of the first water, but also a reasonably fun although overpriced quote virtual reality unquote ride. (And we had lunch at Quark's Bar, which despite its themedness and legendary lousy service, is a pretty good moderately priced restaurant. With the side benefit of being hassled by Klingons while you dine.)

Because everything's better with Klingons.

Anyway, we've been on the Klingon half of the ride before--the Borg half is new as of last year (and not as good, although the three-D effects are reasonably shiny). The best effect is the transporter effect. Convincing enough to be creepy. And no, I won't tell you where it is. The price of admission does include a self-guided trip through the Star Trek museum, though, which is pretty nifty, especially from a costume design standpoint. ("Oh! That's how they did that!")

Anyway, our day was made more surreal by a Klingon insult comic ("Dull knives are best for those for dull wits. I'll leave you to it.") and the classic Klingon joke "Two dead Ferengi in a box."

And at some point during our adventure into geeky campiness, I realized that the Federation has in its hands a sure fire means to defeat the Borg.

Ready for it?

Hortas.

If they were thinking--which, admittedly, nobody has yet proved the Federation capable of--what they'd do is load up their front line Borg-fightin' ships with horta marine commando units. When you engage the Borg, you either beam the hortas aboard the Borg ships, or just fire them at them, using your photon torpedo launchers.

And then the hortas (who are pretty fast movers, as I recall) simply eat their way through the target cube. Okay, you wind up with some king-sized hortas. But dude, we got cargo bays. We'll get you home.

Assimilate this, jerkface.
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