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bear by san

March 2017



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bear by san

and the devil is downhearted

In other news, why did I only find out yesterday about the new Kojak series with Ving Rhames? You people are supposed to keep me informed! (declines to date self by mentioning how she used to beeeeg to be allowed to stay up past her bedtime to watch Kojak)

progress notes for 21 March 2005


New Words: 0
Total Words: 17,305
Pages: 81
Reason for stopping: Well, it seems to be time for some heavy-duty brainwork. Also time for my traditional reshuffling of the first hundred pages. (This always happens
Mammalian Assistance: Mebd is on my notebook and Paladin is sprawled where I am sure to run him over with my chair.
Stimulants: seltzer. Just about to go make tea now. Mmm, tea.
Exercise: I suspect there will be walking today. Walking! And maybe much easier yoga than yesterday; I tried my third-hardest dvd, and got through it, except for the headstands. (I didn't do headstands when I five, people.) But it kicked my butt. So. Maybe the second-easiest one today.

(I have six; "fingernail-chewing boring," "easy," "moderate," "challenging," "tough," and "death by ujjayi.")
Mail: chance88088 pointed this out to me: "This Tragic Glass" made the Tiptree long list. This is my silly grin. This is my silly grin on crack. (conga-rats also to the Estimable Mr. Barzak, who is a Good Egg. (I'm sure others on the list are too, but I don't know them and the yare unlikely to be reading this space.) (It's all about the nepotism.))
Tyop du jour: n/a
Darling du jour: n/a
Books in progress: Ed Sanders, Tales of Beatnik Glory; Neal Stephenson, Quicksilver (and about to go read more of the latter.)
Interesting research fact of the day: He's a red-eared slider. Of course he's of the devil.
Other writing-related work: lots and lots of handwritten notes and self-questioning. I can tell the book's done that thing they do, where I've got enough on paper that my brain has started picking through the implications and expanding on them, and I'm going to have to do that go-back-and-reshuffle. Which tweaks the guiltmonkey, because hey, I am not writing four pages a day omgtheworldwillendrainsoffireandtheRedSoxwintheWorldSeries. Oh, wait.

This happens every book, and every book, I somehow manage to forget that it happens and convince myself, blithely, that this will be the one I'll write right through. This time, for sure!

But I have 80 pages, and I suspect by the time I'm done reshuffling and growing this bit, it'll be more like 100-120 pages, which is a fourth to a fifth of the book (depending on how long it gets), which is, indeed, a good place for the First Big Explosion.

There are writers who like writing things, and writers who like finishing things. I am, in general, a writer who likes finishing things, but I'm trying to train myself to enjoy the process more, because, dude, I'm going to be doing this for the next fifty years, with a little bit of luck. So it would probably be wise to enjoy it. One can't run on adrenaline all the time.

(Now I want a Bullwinkle icon. "Hey Rocky, watch me pull a rabbit out of my hat!" "RAWR!" Love that show.)

This, despite the fact that I suspect this book will take all year to write (it has that scary, taking-up-lots-of-backbrain-space feel to it) and I'm still on vacation, technically, until I sell something.

Darn brain. Darn guiltmonkeys.


I saw the Satan turtle this morning. Some people's kids.
Dude, if I'd known you had a Kojak fetish I would for sure have alerted you. Of course I only discovered that fact yesterday when I watched 2 earthquake movies on USA and couch-potatoely sat through at least 500 commercials for Kojak during those hours. :)

Love Ving Rhames, I suspect he'll do a great job. The commercials looked good. But then, commercials usually do. That's their job.
Sigh; Rocky the Flying Squirrel was my first crush ever.
(That trick never works.)
eBear doesn't know her own strength.

Ving Rhames was Marcus Wallace in Pulp Fiction, as well as many other fine characters *g*. He's fabulous.

And apparently, they kept the lollipop.
Funny: I used to have a box turtle when I was a kid that had a pattern on one scute that looked more like a cowboy than "Lucky"'s shell resembles Satan, so does that mean that Boxy was touched by John Wayne?
Never mind all that other schtuff! Tiptree! Tiptree! Yay!11!!!1!! (yes, I do know it's the long list, but still... *g*)
Yes!!! (about the sticky part of the novel) It's great to hear you talk about it! I'm going through the same thing now; I sit back and look at the whole story and see all this exploring and rewriting and restructuring that needs to be done, and I start to feel overwhelmed, then I remind myself it happens *every* novel. *tells self to relax*

And, you're right esp. about having to learn to enjoy the chaos rather than fearing it. If we love to write, this is part of writing. I *do* enjoy this part, but it definitely makes me more anxious than the others. And I find myself wanting and needing to spend too many hours at the keyboard, which results in lack of time for un-stressing activities.

I love your posts, Bear. :)
*g* thanks, hon.

And yeah, I tend to get sucked into spending all day at the keyboard too, if I'm not careful.

Bad bear.
You rock mightily.
Congrats on the longlisting. By a curious coincidence, I finally got around to reading that story a couple of days ago and verily it is good. :)

(But I didn't see Kit's character dramatically changing through the he/she stuff; possibly because you forewarned me, though.)
or maybe you're enviable bias-free?

(thank you!)
Thank you. *g* I had harbored a secret hope it would make the Nebula ballot, but as this is its last month of eligibility and only four noms, alas, it won't.

It might just not be as good as I think it is, because I will admit to being unreasonably fond of it.
The thing that finally made me acknowledge that we'll never understand the French, nor they us, was watching "Kojak" on late-night TV in Paris many years ago. The actor who had dubbed Telly Savalas's lines had a really high-pitched squeaky voice --- right up in the Penelope Pitstop range. The effect was... was... damn, I'm supposed to be good with words, aren't I?
the horror... the horror...
>>In other news, why did I only find out yesterday about the new Kojak series with Ving Rhames?<<

I only found out yesterday myself--and I might still not've known except for the fact that it got a little feature in this week's edition of TV Guide, which I bought solely for their cover story on Battlestar Galactica.
I came across your post on somebody's friendslist, and I just wanted to say your thoughts on writing were really encouraging to me. I'm totally a newbie to it, but I've been thinking about the backbrain-space thing and trying to learn how to like the process. Anyway, it was good to hear somebody with more experience talking about these things.

*g* Come on in!

ou might check out seriouswriters and words_in_common, as well--support group city *g*
Do you mind my asking which yoga dvds they are? I've been wanting to spice up my rather lame yoga practice, so would much appreciate any recommendations.
The ones I like are the Living Arts Total Yoga and Yoga Flow series, and Rodney Yee's Power Yoga tapes. They're a real good workout, with a lot of variety.