Log in

No account? Create an account
bear by san

March 2017



Powered by LiveJournal.com
bear by san

Page 207 of 655


The writing book hate is nothing to the book hate of the 17th or 18th editing pass.

And I still have to read this thing two more times.

And people wonder why I don't like to do readings.



I have much book hate right now. I can't even imagine what it must be like for you. *shudder*
Top of the Sears Tower.

Unfortunately, it can't go *splat*.
Urgh urgh urgh.

I started this book in 2002. I finished the first draft in 2003. I did a major revision and four minor revisions in 2003, a major revision and a minor revision in 2004, and a major revision in June.

And now I'm doing another minor revision.

At least I don't feel like the whole book sucks, so I guess that June rewrite gained me some ground.

But oh, I am so heartily sick of this book. I can't even remember what's in it and what's been taken out and what's been added any more.

I so hear ya.

*gentle hugs* If it's any consolation, I'm feeling the same about Solace at the moment, and I've not even finished the first draft yet! How the Hel I'm supposed to finish it and get through edits/re-writes by December is beyond me :p
I got a shredder RIGHT HERE. That's unfair temptation, that is.
And people wonder why I don't like to do readings.

For maximum reading-your-own-book-to-an-audience enjoyment you could

(a) read your book backwards
(b) read it in an alternately squeaky/gruff voice
(c) read only the first line of each page
(d) miss out every other word
(e) attempt an on-the-spot translation into a foreign language of your choosing
(f) change all the characters' names to those of current celebrities/politicians
(g) do a shuffle step and high kick at the end of each paragraph
(h) read someone else's book and profess ignorance when people notice
(i) read it in the style of whatsisface from Lucky Jim (was he actually called Jim? I don't know why I'm not certain) -- putting as much sarcasm, bitterness and hatred of the text as you can into your voice
(j) read only the sex scenes
(k) mouth all the words but don't actually make a sound
(l) say "YES!" at the beginning of each sentence
(m) say "NO!" and shake your fist at periodic intervals
(n) drink a full glass of water in the middle of each paragraph
(o) begin and end in the middle of a sentence
(p) read it with Kermit's voice
(q) jump up and down the whole time you're reading
(r) read it as fast as possible
(s) add several "ssseessesesesss" to the ends of all plurals -- everybody loves a Gollum impersonator :D
(t) omit all the verbs
(u) replace all adjectives with "lovely"
(v) tap it out in morse code
(w) use semaphore
(x) mime it
(y) read all the dialogue with a bad Irish accent, adding "begorrah" at strategic intervals
(z) spit as much as possible on all the plosives
( ) I've run out of letters now. Sorry.
LMAO! if I ever do a reading and anyone actually shows up, I'm going to do at least 12 of these. ;)
OMG. I'm on the 3rd and 4th editing pass of my first book and was hoping it would all be over soon....

I'm feeling the same way!